I ran away and headed towards the mountains with a thought of never coming back to the terroir of the abuse 4000 miles away from home.

In yesterday’s past thoughts I felt like a little man trapped in a country were no one understood my true feelings. All I wanted was to get a hair cut to feel good about myself. I asked my ex-wife for $20.00 to pay for the hair cut because I only had a little money to survive in this country that wasn’t my home. But I told her I had no money at all well this was a lie so I could still buy my cigarette and alcohol at night, when I needed to escape her silence towards me. I felt all alone with nobody to talk to in my time of sorrow and miserable existence that was my life. I got caught with money in my wallet because I went anyways to get a hair cut. I tried to say I Paid with a credit card but she said you don’t have one you lair. I felt like a small bug crawling beneath my feet and getting squished like a grape in a vinery. I couldn’t stand it anymore and began to walk towards the mountains in the distance wandering why am I supposed to do with my life, I have nothing to go back to. As I walk for miles and mile, there was a feeling in my mind going around like a swerving memory like I was in a movie or something. I walk at least 20 miles before I looked up and saw a road beside a river that lead up the mountain but not knowing it ended up. To my surprise I thought I saw in the distances a real monkey on the road going to the river well it was but not just one monkey, it was a trib of monkeys at least threety of them just minding there own business. I became afraid that were going to bite me or hurt me real bad. I heard in the distance what sounded like a motorcycle. I was a postman deliving the mail. I stopped him and asked will the try to bite me, he replied no they will be more afraid of you than you think they are. Just walk straight by them without looking at them and they will leave you alone. Well he was right as I walked by and looked back I said to myself why be afraid of what you don’t understand I stop walking and sat down beside the river and watch the family of monkeys just playing in the river with there baby monkeys having so much fun. This went on for 30 minutes or before I wanted to find the end of the road. I end my journey landing up at a place I would call a peaceful solution that I was looking for, It was a Buddhist temple if you can imagine at the base of this beautiful mountain side. I was apprehensive in wanting to knock on the door but my true feeling pushed forward towards the enterance. I was greeted with absolute peaceful thought of this is what I was looking for within my soul. I prayed with him like he was an angel sent to me for all that was good in this world. I had the steagth to go back and face the ex-wife once again. I felt a easy feeling over me at a moment that I needed it the most. I talked it out with the help from her sister. We spent more time talking about what was in the future for our new life in front of us. But by all means our life needed lots of work to be truly happy. We went back to my county with a plan.

http://stefanneff53blog.com/2016/07/28/the-airplane-was-full-of-disappointment-as-if-i-didnt-even-exist-in-this-world

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